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  • Writer's pictureNick Elsey

Cruising the River

Updated: Nov 14, 2018

30 Mar 2009

The Cruiser

Today was a day of pampering. A friend of a friend (the actual connection is far too complex to relate here) has invited us for a day’s cruising on the Swan river – a hard offer to refuse. We’re picked up at 11, ferried to the Royal Flying Squadron yacht club and board a very fancy motor cruiser, complete with a skipper, acres of walnut veneer and more drink than four boat’s worth could consume in a day.


We spend a very pleasant hour or two pootling down river to Fremantle and tie up to one of the restaurants for fish ‘n chips (I mean, what else could one order under the circumstances?). The original plan was a brief foray out into the Indian Ocean for a crossing to Carnac Island (only 10 km from the harbour mouth), but we quickly turn back when the boat starts to pitch and roll once we clear the harbour. Too much danger of spilling one’s drink, don’t you know.


The day’s entertainment was rounded out by one of the guests unfortunately getting stuck in the toilet (aka ‘head’). There was much ingenious fiddling with the lock and more than a couple of bent credit cards to show for it, but to no avail. The only other way out was via a very narrow porthole. She wasn’t coming out, so they eventually sent in a guy to jimmy the lock from the inside. I could have done it of course if it wasn’t for my manly build.


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